After months of doctor's appointments, including multiple trips to the lab, I was so happy to hear those little words from the surgeon: What are you waiting for, it's time to start trying again!! We waited months to hear this!!! So why was I nervous when he said it?
It was fear. Was I ready for potential disappointment again? Another D&C? Administering shots everyday? No, I wasn't. I needed a break. A break from doctor's offices, lack of privacy, blood thinners, test results - even if it was for a good cause - I just wanted the normal life that I knew. Brad and I going out to dinner and bars with friends, a glass of wine, a normal bathing suit and a trip to the pool. A stress-free summer.
I allowed myself one month for this and boy did I need it. I think that it took days to absorb all that had happened in the last 6 months. I cried, I still felt anxious. My body couldn't wrap around the idea that I didn't have anything to worry about! BUT, it gave me some time to acknowledge where I was at this point, what I could handle, and how strong of a person I really was.
When I was in high school, my friends and I were grounded for going out in Atlanta when my parents were out of town. My friend was at home, bored out of her mind, and made each of us a frame with a picture of the words "This too shall pass". Cliche or not, it holds true!! haha
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